90s festival-beyond the surface
On the surface, a 90s festival is an explosion of colour patterns, banging beats, and expressive dancing. The vibe is high and smiles all around. We recall the 90s as the "good old days", reliving it through Dr Alban singing hallelujah and Haddaway asking what is love? It's the gorgeous ladies with the god-given vocal cords in skimpy leather hotpants wailing while the guy sing/rap to the catchy beat. No wonder we still love this era!
Beyond the surface? Dancing through the gates of Slottskogsvallen, I left behind all possible doubt I might be too much, too loud, too expressive, too fast, too too too… I think you get it? Ironically, during the 90s, I learned that I was too much (of many things) and adjusted accordingly. Made myself smaller in countless ways. Now, at 41, I am shedding old beliefs about who I am and who I need to be. And I found this 90s festival to be a perfect symbol of that process.
Letting loose, dancing/bouncing 47 000 steps(!!!) and singing my voice away did something to me. It shook me on a deep level. My whole being vibrated inside and out. All around me were people doing the exact same thing. Living their absolute best lives. With high energy, huge expressions and crazy dancing. I have always fared being the one that stands out, and in this crowd full of expressive individuals, my high energy just blended in. Thankfully, the norm at the festival was to be too much.
Ok, let’s discuss being too much. I don’t believe in it. Not buying it at all. However, it still finds its way into my head and obviously into print; just look above! One thing I learned in therapy is that there are truths that are mine and “truths” that have been forced on me. The idea of people being too much is one of them. And I wish to let go of it. Going to this festival was an important stepping stone in that process. Realising that being around another 14 000 people with similar energy levels made me feel at peace. Suppressing who I genuinely am cost me more energy than if I let all that vibration loose. And those who might find us too much are actually not enough. Ok, that sounds harsh but true tho? Or at least they do not let enough fun into their lives. I stand by that. From now on, I’m flipping the script. High energy is the new normal.
So what did a seemingly silly 90s festival teach me? I love having fun, kinda lost that part of me along the way? Also, I use less energy when I stop correcting and shrinking myself. Just being who I am is pretty damn great. So here’s to a fun rest of the summer; let it be filled with joy and maybe some more 90s beats?