intutition

There is a deep voice inside of me. It is clear. Firm. Knowing. My register is low. All my life, I have been told that you need a high register to be loved, liked, respected, happy and successful. To think that I even sang as a soprano in my youth choir even if I am clearly an alto. Forced and fake, trying to reach unrealistic heights. Knowing who I am, however, driven by anxiety and using survival strategies to cope. Knowing that the most crucial is to meet my basic needs, and if I don't fit in, I won't. It hurts to formulate these words. It hurts like hell. It is also the truth; I need them to be released to be free.

I see a societal shift; all kinds of people are taking up space. With much help from Social Media, we black sheep have finally realised that we are not alone. The ones that are rigid and not too keen on this open and inclusive version of the world are the ones that limited me up until now. I will no longer try to be anything but me. Never ever. I manifested my freedom from my demons in 2019, it has certainly taken a while, but I'm on my way.

At the end of the day, the choir needs their altos. We need all kinds of personalities for a functional and balanced society.